Vitamin D – Time for ME!

The first few days are a blur. The first few weeks are bliss…AND a blur. There is nothing more precious than the hours spent getting to know your little one. I’ve never stared at one thing for so long without getting bored with it. (7 months later and I could still stare at him for hours doing whatever it is he’s doing.) They are truly a miracle. With all of the miraculousness there are the moments of unexpected, overwhelming emotion. The moments when they’re crying and you aren’t sure why. Or they’re wanting to eat AGAIN and it’s 2am and your husband is sound asleep snoring like a baby next to you. Or when the explosive breastfed diaper is ready to be changed and changed…and changed. Or perhaps when all of your single friends are headed to the beach for an endless day in the sun and you can’t bare to think of a bikini, let alone taking your little one out for more than 15 minutes in the heat. Regardless of the moment, it will happen. I’m not saying there is one true remedy, but I want all of you to know it exists and IT IS OK, but most importantly it will pass.

Postpartum is a tough subject because no new mother wants to admit that she can’t handle it or that she isn’t to the moon with joy at the very same time. Remember all of those oxymorons I mentioned about motherhood (in an earlier post), this is one of them. I wouldn’t say I experienced postpartum like the text-book describes it, but perhaps the more loosely used term “baby blues”. Let me give you the back story: My amazing husband, for those of you who don’t know, owns his own HV/AC company (heating and cooling) and when you have a baby during the midst of the hottest months of the year, you don’t take into account that everyone’s AC doesn’t magically fix itself. Therefore, mommy duty was full force almost instantly. While Gary was there as often as he could be (and an amazing dad nonetheless), his sometimes 12 hour shifts left me home understanding what military wives, single moms, and many other mothers who do it alone experience 24/7. (To those women: God bless you!) I then allowed him to get his normal nights sleep while I got up with the baby every time, because I felt guilty waking him when he had worked so hard the day before. Which then led to my getting no actual sleep.

Most women, I believe, were made to be mothers. We can do it all, all the time. Without women, men wouldn’t know that they even had a head atop their shoulders (sorry babe, but it’s true). However, in the midst of “doing it all” I had a moment. A moment where instead of being “MOM”, I needed MY mom.

Thankfully, her house is only about 20 houses down from me and she was there with the daycare kids accepting me and Coop with open arms. Like always, I put on my brave face, got dressed, dressed my little stud muffin in his swim trunks and hat and strolled down looking as proud and feeling as blessed as ever. (See, oxymoron in full effect!) I got there, passed him to her loving care, and headed straight for the pool. I jumped in, swam under water to the other side and by the time I surfaced I had tears rolling down my cheeks. I couldn’t explain it, I didn’t even know what one thing would make it better. I wanted to hold Cooper and kiss him and love him and tell God again and again how thankful I was, but I needed this time, even if it only lasted for a few minutes, for me. As the tears flowed, I climbed aboard a raft, and within moments passed out…for those of you who haven’t caught on…the root of the problem = exhaustion! It is not normal or suggested for any human being to sleep in cycles of 1 hour, for a total of less than 6 hours in a 24 hour period. I woke up after I felt my milk machines overly engorged and ready for baby. Opening my eyes to the bright sun, I felt entirely rejuvenated and couldn’t wait to end “me” time and rejoin little Coop. (Come to find out my eternal nap was only 40 minutes! But 40 minutes of uninterrupted sleep is bliss in those early days.) Reuniting with him was bliss, my positive oxymoron was back in full force. From then on out, I took advantage of my moms help. I also learned that Coop loves the Vitamin D too!

The point of my rant is:

1. IT IS OK to feel not 110%. Our bodies have just gone through major trauma, our hormones are all out of whack and we are exhausted. Your baby doesn’t feel less loved and no one thinks you love them less.

2. ASK FOR HELP or accept when others offer to let you rest while they sit with the baby.

3. Your husband will survive if he has to wake up once or twice with the baby. USE him.

4. SHARE your feelings with another mom. Just letting it out will help you feel better.

5. TAKE YOU TIME (even if it is for JUST 40 minutes)!

Best of luck to all of you mommies. If you need someone to chat with or a place to get out of the house and relax, come visit us at the store, we love meeting all the new babies! And remember if these types of feelings do persist, reach out to your physician. There are so many people willing to help and ways to get back on a stable mindset for you and your baby’s health.